Following on from last week’s post about why your mates don’t want you to lose weight we thought you might like a refresher on how to be the perfect diet friend. So here are five things you might be doing wrong if your pal is trying to lose weight and how to fix them:
To Kill a Mocking Bud
We men don’t tend to be nice to our friends. It’s not because we’re inherently mean, it’s just what we do. Almost every word we say to one another is some form of insult and because that’s a social norm with which most men feel comfortable, we all laugh it off and we call it “banter”. The trouble is, when we start ribbing a mate for making a positive change in his life, it can be the undoing of him. You might think it’s a laugh to start calling your mate ‘GQ’ because he’s started jogging, but it will probably embarrass him into giving up, so lay off, eh?
Ten Reasonably-Sized Indians
A positive lifestyle change shouldn’t kill a man’s social life, so if your mate is trying to lose weight and you still want him to be part of your curry club, you can help massively by limiting yourself to sensible portions and laying off the sundries so he doesn’t feel emasculated or ostracised. Or offer to split a chicken tandoori and chapatti rather than insisting he necks a bucket of bhajis.
When you’re planning a get together, try to think outside the box… the box in this case being the pub. Some of the best group activities are, well, active, so why not get everyone together for a hike, or some five-a-side, or a game of ice hockey, if you’re a Canadian desperate to play to stereotype?
The Silence of the Lads
If you can see your mate is doing well, don’t keep schtum. It might feel a bit weird to compliment another man on his appearance, but letting a mate know that his weight loss has been noticed can be a huge boost for him and can mean the difference between perseverance and quitting.
The Bullshitter’s Guide to the Galaxy
Giving advice is only helpful if you actually know what you’re talking about, so if your friend is on a diet, don’t imagine you’ll be doing him any favours by spouting some gubbins you read in the Daily Mail about how lettuce gives you cancer. Listen more than you talk is always a good idea: he may well have things he wants to get off his chest about stretch marks – if you’re a quality mate you’ll even listen to that.